• EMOTIONAL BALANCE

    For me, achieving Emotional Balance is nothing but reaching our own mindful heart. I believe, that a mindful heart is one who feels 100%, understands 100%, with 100% awareness of being in the present. Once that is achieved, then it becomes easier for a human being to connect the present with the future to step up the ladder of success. 

    Arati Suryawanshi.

    When I was working with an institute before, I attended a meeting, wherein, my colleague and I were given one project to complete. When we started working on the project, we realised that we were having a hard time achieving it. My colleague was looking at it through the lens of performance while I was looking at it through the lens of detail. Hence, since we didn't have a common approaches to a common goal, our process was that much tougher. When we tried to look at it again, we found that, both our thoughts were important, both our intentions were the same as we both wanted our project to be done wonderfully. But our ways were completely different. Both the ways have their own assets to leverage and at the same time they also have their own flaws. Rather than indulging in confrontation, we decided to have a meeting. 

    While thinking about both situations, we found that:

    --Working on a project with more details gave us new insights and ideas towards it. Hence, we might struggle to achieve the project as we wanted it in our own way, in the given time-line.

    --At the same time, when we work with little more leisure and freedom, it is good,  since we work with joy. But again, there is a danger of not being perfect, or leaving important aspects unacknowleged.

    So, how to achieve what we want to achieve? And how to seek the Balance? 

    What did we do in the middle of this Banter; and could we reach to the answer of Balance?

    We both of us , decided to have a meeting,  When both of us were discussing it, we decided that, we needed to answer the question, why we were behaving like this. And we started thinking upon the question; what was affecting our balance? 

    What we brainstormed is the answer of the above question. 

    We reached a few facts: 

    1. We are unable to do it as expected because we have suddenly stopped giving a ear to each other, as if we don't know how to use hearing ability. 

    2. One thing we found that, we were getting hijacked by our own emotions. As if we were stuck with a Fevicol over there. No one wanted to move from that space. 

    3. Another thing we understood is that, we were reacting as if we were tied or we were working from our default modes. 

    4. We also found that we have developed a pattern. And not only this situation but also other situations we want to perform the same way. 

    5.  Our empathy for each other suddenly reduced. 

    6. Our goal shattered, no coordination, synchronization and no motivation to achieve what we supposed to achieve.

    7. Decision making capacities were on hold. They were actually not working that particular time, and even if they worked it was not for common good. 

    8. And we were very far from understanding the consequences about the situation. 

    We have discussed many other things but these were the main points which I feel important to place here. 

    Emotional Balance, or balance of any thing, takes place when two things come together with all their good effects. But it can take place only when we understand the imbalance. When we decided to minimize the flaws and work towards a common purpose, we started seeing the light, hope, various other options, and ultimately SUCCESS. We need all the above things to reach the balance. And we need both the parties to move towards it, have action towards the balance. 

    The answer to reach the emotional balance is to become mindful, look closely towards the situation and thinking from heart. 

    What happence when we apply our mindful heart?

    1. With this 'WISDOM' is added into our final decision.

    2. We develope a differenct perspective for Our final decisions, regarding our relationships, our work, our family situations, our social situations.

    3. Our reaction turns into response.

    4. Our overall Health improves.

    5. Our Emotional well-being improves.

    6. We become smarter than before with our emotions as well as our decisions. 

    7. We become more able to be in our own present moment awareness. 

    8. We are more able to understand our consequences and connect our present with our future.  And step up on the ladder of SUCCESS. 

    Writer:

    Arati Suryawanshi

    Researcher, EQ Consultant,

    C.E.O. Mindful Heart Consultancy

    Fort Mumbai, mindful.heart@yahoo.com

    Powered by www.mindfulheartconsultancy.com

     

     

     

     

     


  •                             WHAT IS A TRUE FRIENDSHIP?

    Friendship is faith, trust, joy, fun, creating something together.
     
    Friendship is true, when it is not always based upon ego, it is true when it is open and others are allowed to become friends with your friend.
     
    It is true when it has some positive cause but it is hampered when it is developed for some selfish motive.  
     
    It is true when friend is always available for you in all your challenges and in any odd times. But it is not true, when fake reasons are given to keep friendship going.
     
     
    Friendship based upon truth lasts longer.
     
     
     
     
     MINEIN :1
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    When two friends come together for a good cause they create something beautiful.
     
     
     
     
     TRY THIS ACTIVITY
     
     
     
    1.    For this activity, you need one A4 size paper, two pencils, one table and two chairs or you also can sit down to perform this activity.
     
     
    2.    A paper will be kept between both of you and you both will start drawing on it.  Both will be drawing on the same paper and on the same topic.
     
    3.    It has been observed that Initially people have torn at least one paper, asked for making two halves of the paper, not become easily ready to draw on the same topic. Showed less amount of trust. And that also loosen their confidence.
     
    4.    Let it happen in the beginning for some time; and then give them a minute to think for a while.  And Start again.
     
    5.    Many of them find out way to complete the task. And take the challenge quite well. Some of them still have problems. May be the other friend is taking more paper, more space or something like this or the common complaint is, other person is spoiling the drawing. Just observe whatever is happening.
     
    6.    Discuss and Debrief.
     
     
     
    Every reaction, there is a new scope for learning.
     
     
    MINEIN : 2
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    A True friend is that who connects.
     
     
     What does research say?
     

    :: CHARACTERISTICS OF SOCIAL CONNECTIONS AND HAPPINESS ::

     

     

     

    • Loving relationships are crucial to our well-being and happiness.
    • Connections and relationships create space for safety and support that help us to explore and learn more. 
    • We can build more resources and cope up appropriately with stress and adversity.
    • Self - worth is validated. 
    • Diverse ideas and influences help us to grow and become successful.
    • Fun, care and celebration of good times.
    • People with strong social connections have less stress-related health problems, lower risk of mental illness, and faster recovery from trauma. 
    • Healthy life-style habits are promoted.
    • Psychologist James H. Fowler studied the data of 5,000 people over 20 years and found that happiness benefits other people through three degrees of connection, and that the effects last for a year. 
    • He says, " We found a statistical relationship not just between your happiness and your friends' happiness, but between your happiness and your friends' friends' happiness."
    • The concept "hedonic adaption" is may be an exception here.  Hedonic Adaption is that, joys of loves and trimphs and sorrows of losses and humiliation fade with time. 
    • In contrast to material goods, we are more likely to continue to want our close relationships, even after we attain them, and to continue to derive positive emotions from them. 
    • Christakis suggests that, “There is a new kind of hierarchy we might think about as policymakers and social scientists. It’s not just whether you are rich or poor, black or white, urban or rural. It’s also about where you are located in the network.”
    • Zen Habits, by Leo Babauta, He mentions that, with connections we also meet with new opportunities, collaborations and emergence of new creation which was not before there. 
    • He also explains the importance being open for new people and thoughts. And coming real with other people rather than just a knowledgeable, smart, accomplished and funny person. That is also true but not completely true so, there is a danger that these things may hinder in the process of being a true friend and create true connections. Sometimes being vulnerable is not bad. That shows trust among all other new strange people. And that may also increase the possibility of trustworthy, deeper connections and long-lasting better friendships. 
     
    So be a good friend, be real, be vulnerable, be connected. Have a great friendship day. 

    Google Images : 1
     
     
     
     
    Resourses: 
     
    http://zenhabits.net/connect/
     
    http://www.pbs.org/thisemotionallife/topic/connecting/connection-happiness
     

    https://edge.org/panel/nicholas-christakis-the-science-of-social-connections-headcon-13-part-v

     
    Images ( first 2) : From MinEin : Mindfulness Emotional Intelligence Program.
     


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